I don't think I'll ever understand Emily. She's an enigma, wrapped in a riddle with a side of huh?
When we first told the girls we were pregnant (with Violet) we told them that someone would have to share a bedroom. We didn't get too much further into that conversation before I lost the baby.
When we told them we were pregnant with Connor we again told them that someone would be sharing a room. Since we were on Team Green the final decision would obviously not be made until he/she was born, which was fine since the baby would be in our room for the first two months or so anyway. We'd have time to switch rooms around. We told Emily that the privilege of being the oldest meant she got to make the initial choice. She could share with Mary Jo or she could keep her own room, Mary Jo would share with the baby and if the baby was a boy Mary and Emily would have to share a room together by the time the baby was about a year or so.
Emily decided right away that she wanted to share with Mary Jo (which was just as well because Mary was going through a phase in which she slept in Emily's room on the little couch most nights anyway)
So off we went to Leon's to get a bunk bed and they decided to move in with each other right away, 6 months before the baby was even due.
As one would expect these two sharing a room has it's ups and downs. There is the perpetual mess. And though I constantly tidy, clean, freecycle and throw out things from their room it's like the toys grow from the carpet. But I must be thankful that it's only one room to clean and not two. And there is the fighting. Emily now has the old bathroom-turned-closet-playroom as her private sanctuary. But there are also the benefits. Mary worships her sister and loves having the same room as her. They do get along relatively well and I'll often hear giggles from deep within the room.
But - Emily has often complained that she'd love to have her own room again.
So, recent events have given us a free room. After talking with my mom we collectively decided that should Emily want her own room she could move downstairs. I even devised a wonderful birthday surprise plan that involved redecorating the whole room and surprising her with it.
I thought I'd feel her out first, just to see if she'd be on board. So I mentioned, very casually, that if she wanted her own room that she could have the room downstairs. Her immediate response was "Then I'd have to go up and down the stairs all the time" (this unwillingness to do stairs would be a side effect of being raised in a bungalow)
So I let it go but every now and then I'd make a comment like "You know, another perk of having your own room again would be no more playpens (the girls room is a nap room for one of the daycare kids) Still nothing.
So my mom spoke with her and said that if she wanted her own room my mom would move into the back room and Em could have hers at the bottom of the stairs.
This time it was an unequivocal no. She does not want her own room after all.
I suppose part of it could be her issues with my dad's illness and passing. I think too though that Emily has decided that maybe the grass isn't necessarily greener on the other side. She likes the company and Mary's not such a bad roommate.
And if anything, the room is there and ready for when she wants it. I'm sure a couple of more years from now when I have two teenagers one will be begging to move into that room.