I'm feeling really down. I feel like a quitter. I feel disappointed. I feel like I gave up. I beat cancer but Mother Nature had the last laugh.
It's been raining All. Day. Long. In fact, we've had just as much rain today as we got in the entire month of May. We've been having wind gusts up to 60 km an hour. Trees are down all over the neighbourhood and power is out in a lot of places. Union Station (a major transportation hub) was closed because of flooding.
But we muscled through. Sean and I went out at 4 pm to set up our tents. There were maybe 15 other teams out there setting up their stuff too. At that point, it was windy but not raining. We got the tent up and just as we were getting our rain cover on to the tent a big gust took it like a sail, pulled the tent down and snapped one of the poles. Sean's $200, 10 man tent....ruined. After much swearing we decided to leave the tent down until the weather was more cooperative. I went and signed us in, got my yellow survivor shirt (yeehaw!) and our dinner coupons.
While we were eating the rain started again. With a terrible fury. So Sean and I decided to fold up the tent and put it away, since now it's not only broken but soaking wet. As we were getting packed up my brothers got there, also soaked.
We gathered in the school cafeteria where they moved us all for the opening ceremonies. All the speeches were made and then we survivors got to do our lap.
I will admit, I'm a little glad my first survivor lap was done inside the school. We walked through the hallway of the school around to where we started and when we passed by the cafeteria the rest of the participants were cheering for us. And I did fine until that point and then the tears started. Normally, when this lap is done, outside, the cheering is the whole time we do the lap and I'd have been a hot mess.
At this point the kids were soaking wet and cold, we were soaking wet and cold and everyone was miserable. So I sent the kids home with my mom. There was no tent for them to go in and no where for them to get warm and dry. I don't need them getting sick.
Sean, my brothers and my sisters in law and nieces and nephews decided to do some laps. We were already wet and cold so we didn't figure there was any harm in getting wetter and colder. So we joined the other 8 people on the track doing laps.
But in the end, Mother Nature had the last laugh. The wind was brutal. The rain was coming in sideways and it's just downright miserable out there. So after a few laps we packed it in and came home.
Part of me feels horribly guilty. I feel like I cheated, drumming up all these donations and not sticking it out for the night but the other part of me says - the point of the event was to raise the money...and I did that. I walked my survivor lap and my family celebrated with me.
So we picked up our luminaries and came home.
To say I'm disappointed would be the understatement of the century. I know if I'd asked Sean to stay he would have endured it all night with me....but truth be told.....I have what it takes to beat cancer...I don't think I have what it takes to beat Mother Nature.
Here's hoping next year is better.
Okay, we'll just sit out in the wind and rain since the tent is broken.
The little green tent and the orange tent...both blew over.
The others ones; most gone by the time we left.
The angry sky. And that frame being put up there...their tent ripped to shreds before they gave up.
Yep, the weather sucked THAT much!
Our Luminary heart...for all the people we Relay for.