Sunday, March 23, 2014

No Make Up Selfies

I'll bet you've got friends who have posted them on Facebook or Twitter. Maybe even you've posted one yourself. (though if that's the case, you may want to read someone else's blog today - you may not like what I have to say)

I read about the no make up selfies before they ever made it to my newsfeed. It started in the UK. Why, no one really knows but at some point someone turned it into a cancer awareness campaign. Don't get me started on that.  At least in this case it worked somewhat and I've read different reports that it's raised upward of $2 million in the UK. Good for them. (I'm not being facetious).

But this isn't a rant about doing stupid and cryptic things on Facebook in the name of cancer awareness. We've been down that road and that horse has 'bin done kilt.'

No, this is about something else.

It's about selfies. I don't get them. Maybe this officially puts me into the 'old lady' category but I just don't get it.

Actually, let me be a little more clear. I do get it when it comes to teenagers. Teenagers are insecure. They need a lot of social recognition, validation and acceptance and selfies are one way of getting it. Having said that, I've seen more than my fair share of teenage girl's selfies on my daughter's Facebook and Twitter feeds that are highly questionable and I wonder to myself, "Where the hell are your parents and why are you still allowed on the internet?" But alas, I can only parent my own children.

No, the selfies I'm taking about are the ones that are taken by middle aged adults, weekly, with captions about where they are or who they are with or what they are doing. 

Why? Why do you need to get that weird angled, up close picture of your face, or those extra awesome ones of you in the bathroom mirror holding your phone in front of you? (Just a tip for iPhone users, you can use the volume control on your Apple headphone to snap a picture so if you put a little thought into it you could position your phone in such a way that it captures you without it being in the picture...just sayin') Is a giant picture of your face relevant to what you posted, you know, like "Look at my great new hair cut!" Is it to prove you've actually been to the place you claim you've been at? Is it so that people can put your face to your name? Is it so everyone will comment on how beautiful you are?

If you're at Niagara Falls why not take a picture of the Falls and post that instead of a picture of your face with  a tiny glimpse of the Falls in the corner. Or, here's a thought, if it's because you want a picture of you and the Falls together - ask someone to take the picture for you so that you can actually see something more than just your face.

Because here's the thing. I like you. I think you're beautiful. But I don't need to see what your bathroom or bedroom looks like reflecting in a mirror. I don't need to see your face grinning at me while you hold the camera above your head to hide your double chin 17 times in one week. Once in a while, so you can put a new profile picture up, sure....but come one folks, ease up on the selfies. They just make you look like a vain douche bag. And everything thinks so, they're just too nice to say it. Either that or they've already defriended you.

I love this picture because the girl on the right totally looks like me!

As an afterward, there's a valuable lesson to go along with this post. I did an image search to come up with that little graphic up there. Sweet Jesus, whatever you do, don't search "selfie clip art" on Yahoo. I am just happy none of my kids were in the room or they would have had an education!!

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