39!

This time last year I was newly boobless and hopped up on all sorts of good drugs.

Today is my 39th birthday.

I never really stressed about getting older; why bother? You can't stop it so rather than complain, just embrace it. Despite the trials and tribulations I've endured this past 9 years my 30's have been the best years of my life. And I fully intend to enjoy the final year of them.

It was a quiet birthday. Sean had the day off because he had to go to court as a witness against the GO Bus driver who rammed into him last year. But, unbeknownst to us the case was adjourned (again!) so we were in and out.

So we came home, hung out for a bit and then went to the driving range to hit a bucket of balls. It's the first time either of us has been in 2 years. It was fun, though my left arm didn't hold up too well (I'm all arthritic from the herceptin)

We went the butcher and bought some great big fat steaks (no grocery store meat fridge steaks for me!) Sean made them to perfection - just this side of dead and served them up with baked potato and grilled veggies. Mmmmmm.  And ice cream cake for dessert.

And now here I sit, nursing my glass of wine while Sean kills people on the xbox. I'm going to go soak in the bath with my Kobo. My girlfriends got me a Chapters card for my birthday so I've got to replenish my book supply. I think I'll buy the second 50 Shades of Grey book. I wasn't sold on the first one but I've been promised that it gets better.  If it does, I'll buy the third.

I'm one year older....one year stronger.....one year better!

Happy Birthday to me!  

Have You Noticed?

Have you noticed that my posts have lacked depth lately?

I have.

I'm sorry, my brain has gone on vacation apparently. It's been a busy summer.

Where do I begin?

I spent the first part of the summer getting caught up in my one year follow up appointments. I saw my radiation oncologist (who wants me to be seen every 3 months - alternating between him and my medical oncologist) He said everything looked good and that the patch of itchy skin on the surgery sight "doesn't look like skin cancer" which until that very moment I didn't fear it was and now I obsess about it non stop.

I had a physical and my thyroid numbers came back elevated. This happened while I was vacationing at the trailer with the fam and therefore without the assistance of Dr. Google. Thankfully my friend and resident medical know-it-all was only a text away and she reassured me that it was likely just hyperthyroidism.

I had the numbers checked again and it turned out it was a lab error and in fact, my thyroid is just fine.

Then we move on to the weird neck pain/lump in the throat. I felt like I had a swelling in the left side of my neck and I've felt like I've had a lump in my throat since I had the sore throat during radiation. Naturally I'd convinced myself I've got some kind of neck cancer. Oh, and let's not forget the new chronic heartburn. Esophageal cancer? We won't take into consideration that because Sean's family has been here the entire month of August I've been eating everything in sight and drinking....a lot. I went to the Dr and he didn't feel or see anything in my neck/throat and thinks it's likely stress. I don't doubt it. As I come to the end of my herceptin (5 left) I find myself getting more anxious about a recurrence.

On a happier note, I've got an appointment with a new plastic surgeon in November and I'm optimistic about this guy.

In two days I'll be celebrating my first 'Rebirth Day'.  My boobiversay. My first full year without my full lady parts.

I've been planning a tattoo and I've finally settled on the design I want. I'm hoping Sean will take my not so subtle hints (read: me telling him I didn't want the lovely $400 sculpture - I want my tattoo)  and tell me to go ahead and make the appointment. It's not that he's opposed to the tattoo - I've already got one  - it's more the cost. And normally that wouldn't be a problem too but you see I've decided to treat myself to a vacation.

I've talked a bit about it but I'll elaborate.

One of my PP sisters is getting married/renewing vows and I've decided to fly across the country to crash her wedding. (okay, not a total crash, she knows I'm coming) But, it's giving me the chance to spend some time with not one but two of the women who were such a big part of my 'long distance cheering section'.

I'm sure there are some people who know me (IRL) who think I'm absolutely insane to fly across the country to spend 5 days with someone I've never met. It's something we teach our kids about - you never know who is on the other end of your computer screen.

After 5 years of talking to these ladies daily, via email, text, mail and phone - I know some of them better than I know some of my 'in person' friends.

But all of that aside, I'm excited beyond belief to be stepping outside of the 'quiet, reserved, shy, non risk taker' me and go on this adventure. And I'm so excited about seeing the pacific ocean and mountains. And I'm so excited to be sharing in my PP sisters special day.

I just have to get on that plane.